What is it about me that has you in such a lather?
You’re all worked up offering nothing but blather
What did I ever do to you to deserve such abuse?
Looks like someone should steer clear of “the juice”

You’ve had it in for me from the moment I started
You’ve been counting down the days until I finally departed
Your reputation for kindness has got to be a joke
Your relentless vitriol has been making me choke

While others applaud and often encourage my thoughts
You publicly seeth as the king of the snots
You repeat your one complaint as if I missed it the first time
I would like you so much better if you were a motionless mime

I tolerated your bullshit for as long as I could
But engaging with you is like talking to cat food
You think and you feel much differently than me
I can live with that so why continue this hostility?

You say I’m a show-off who has hijacked your group
But the reality is you’re an envious old poop
Stuck in a past that will never come again
Selling your phony propaganda right until the end

No one ever asked you to be so rude to me
No one really cares if you enforce your vulgar policy
You can hate that I’m smart and have something to say
Thankfully you’re much older and will soon wither away

The biggest reason why you’re such a pompous dick
Is that you hide behind a pseudonym and a phony pic
I don’t know your real name and I hope I never do
You’re like the ebola virus crossed with the flu

A living cancer that remains uncontained
How I wish you were illegal on the verge of being detained
Life’s too short to put up with deluded snobs like you
Now that I’ve left whatever will you do?

You instinctively know how to ruin someone’s fun
It’s like you crashed a great party and pulled out a gun
I don’t have to be right but I need to be sane
Because listening to you is a colossal pain

You’re an insufferable old bag masquerading as a censor
You may prefer your own views but we both know who’s denser
Your blood would stop boiling if you ever had a clue
I’d rather be “annoying” than a coward like you

Why you hate my guts I’ll never understand
No matter what I say you’ll never be a fan
I just can’t win with you and I never will
You need a lifetime to learn how to chill

You gave me a great reason to leave it all behind
No more of your dopey remarks to infiltrate my mind
My life is better spent hanging with kind friends
Than tolerating a codger who will soon rely on Depends

Dennis Earl
Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
Monday, August 29, 2011
7:43 p.m.

Published in: on August 29, 2011 at 7:45 pm  Comments (1)  

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  1. […] 15. That miserable, anonymous old bag who kept giving me a hard time in the CFNY Facebook group because I liked posting bits of trivia (or “wiki-facts”, as he put it) which was pretty much appreciated by most everybody else.  He couldn’t take it.  Said we already have an Alan Cross.  (What?  There’s no room for two?)  Glad I left.  I’d rather be happy.  On the plus side, his embarrassing behaviour inspired this and this. […]

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